Just Some Bitching...

I need to vent now, and since my best friend no longer lives with me, I have no one to vent to.  It's about her anyway, so I guess that's a good thing.  I wanted to post some smart ass comment on FB, but she would know it was about her and would only make her feel bad, which would make me feel bad, and I hate that feeling.  I almost sent her a text, but I couldn't do that either.  I hate knowing I purposely hurt someone's feelings knowing it wouldn't make me feel any better anyway.  So I come here.

I don't know if I mentioned this here before, but a few months back she lied to me.  She asked if a friend of hers who was bicycling down the east coast could crash with us for a couple of nights.  Sure!  No problem.  So I met him that second day, he was a nice guy and all.  Then after he left she informed me that she'd never met him before.  She'd signed up for a couch surfing website and he found her through it.  She didn't think I'd say yes to him staying if she told me that, so she made the decision to purposely lie to me.  The situation turned out well and was in the past, so I said I was okay with it.  But I wasn't.  It ate away at me, and I confronted her about it a couple of months later after she purposely didn't tell me about something else.  She said she was sorry, but it still hurt.  She was trying to help someone out, which is nice, but she lied to me so that she could get her way.  

Anyways, someone wrote an article about him, and he mentioned how he stayed here.  How he met this man and woman and asked why they weren't a couple.  He later learned that they got married, and the man posted on his FB thanking him for the nudge.  So if she hadn't lied to me, he wouldn't have stayed here, given them the nudge, and now they wouldn't be married.  That's how the article read to me.  Not really, but it brought back all those hurt feelings, and now I'm mad.

I'm also mad because my parents stopped by today with all the paperwork for this brand spankin new computer I have.  It's basically all invoices showing exactly how much they paid for it and all the accessories and software they gave me.  It was waaaaayyyyy too expensive and makes me feel guilty for them spending so much.  Why the eff would they spend all that then give me the breakdown??  That money could have gone towards way more important things.  Plus I already had a computer that works fine!  It's old, slow, loud and the disc drive doesn't work anymore, but it was fine for what I used it for.  AAAAHHHH!  Plus the boyfriend was building me one for Christmas, which they didn't know, and I couldn't tell them after they gave it to me.

I want to talk to someone, but I don't know who.  I would talk to my roommate, but she's gone and it's about her.  I would talk to the boyfriend, but he's at work and it seems trivial when I actually think about it.  I would call my parents and fuss, but it would just make them feel bad.  Why can't I just get things off my chest to the people who are frustrating me and not worry about how it makes them feel??  That's stupid, but I wish I could sometimes.  I try to be a better person than that.  So I come here.

I want to yell and scream and cry, but it won't do anything but make me feel stupid.  I would go to the gym to try to work it out but can't because of my freakin back.  AAAH!  So I come here.

Oh, first world problems.  How stupid and trivial they really are.