Sunday, September 22, 2013

The Third Wheel

That's what I have been my entire life.  I'm always the friend of the girl who's got the admirer/boyfriend that doesn't want me hanging around so he can make his moves.


When I was in high school, my best friend and I were kind of inseparable.  I learned several months after she and her boyfriend broke up that he blamed me for the split.  I'd had no idea and hated it.  I was single up until I met the ex-husband when I was 24.  Before that I had always been the tag along, the one who got the pity invite.

A couple of years ago the roommate and I were supposed to be having dinner together, then she informed me that she had invited her boyfriend.  She asked if I was cool with it after the fact, and what was I supposed to say?  No, not at all?  Technically he was the third party, but it didn't work out that way.  I sat in the back seat and watched them hold hands while he tried to guess the private location of her newest tattoo.  Throughout dinner I watched them.  It sucked.  The past couple of years I've had to endure it from time to time, and eventually I just decided to not put myself in those kind of situations anymore.

Last night the roommate had a friend over, and we all hung out talking.  It was nice feeling equal.  She came home tonight and said he was coming back over in a bit to watch a movie we'd talked about yesterday.  One I really want to see.  I asked if it was cool if I watched it with them, or if they wanted to be alone.  I asked just to be on the safe side.  She then told me that he actually came back over last night at midnight, they just slept (yeah, sure) in the same bed together, and he left at 6am.  Awesome.

I said I would not be watching the movie with them because it would be awkward.  She insisted that it wouldn't be and that she wanted me to watch it with them, but I refused.  She may pretend not to know it, but if he stayed in her bed last night, he definitely doesn't want me watching the movie with them.

So he arrived a few minutes ago, and I've purposely stayed here writing this.  I hate being a third wheel in my own house.

Oh, yeah... She also told me tonight that her alcoholic ex-boyfriend crashed his car today and called her to rescue him.  And because he lives twenty minutes from his job and we live about five, she invited him to crash with us and that she wasn't going to let him drink in the house.  So he'll be detoxing while crashing on my couch.  Actually it'll probably be in her bed, but whatever.  More awesome.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Boy and Pet Schtuff

It's a beautiful day.  It's cool outside with a nice breeze, and this has been the first non hot and sticky day I've actually been home to enjoy having the windows open since moving in.  I'm drinking a cup of coffee and listening to the birds sing.  Life is good.

The ex-bf and I had a talk about what we are to each other, what we're doing, and our future.  Basically, there is no long-term future.  He does not like this place and desperately wants to move.  I do not.  So that's that.  We're hanging out having a good time and enjoying each others' company for now.  I told him I do know the direction I want my life to be heading and I need to get on that soon.  He understood.  I told him I don't want to hurt him, and he assured me I wouldn't be.

Of course, I'm both happy and sad about this.  I'm very happy that we've finally talked about it and are on the same page.  I'm sad because we get along so well, and I really wanted him to be the one.  I do love him, and as cliche as it sounds, I do hope we can remain friends after we both move on.  We'll see.

He's going on vacation tomorrow, and I'll be keeping his dog... the one we got together.  I miss him and hated giving up another dog, but once again, they're good for each other.  My puppy is doing well and will be three years old this weekend!

My boss used to be a professional photographer, and last week she did portraits of all the staff and their pets.  We did head shots during the day, then went to the river after work.  I "puppynapped" the ex's dog and took him to the river too and will put a collage together as a Christmas gift, after a little editing out of the leash.  It was fun, and here are some good ones...


He was so good at posing, we had to dress him up!

No words... haha!

The flash scared him every time, so not too many good close ups.

Yep, that's me, haha.

For his first time at the river and on a dock, he did really well!


Happy, smiling pooch.



I love all my animals!!