Sunday, February 26, 2012

No More Balloons

I feel like a really terrible person sometimes.  Just in one particular situation.  At other times I'm fine with it.  It's got to end though.  It's not who I am and it's not going to get me anywhere.  It's a temporary fix at best.  I feel like it could bring me really bad karma if it hasn't already.  Time to be done with it.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Waiting to switch the laundry so I can go to bed...

Bummin a little tonight.  Went to one of those host in your home parties with demonstrations and then the selling of stuff.  It was less than stellar.  Good food and wine, but also anxiety and self-seclusion.  I hate how I can physically feel it work its way over my whole body.

Now I'm home with no roommate, and I'm lonely.  I'm giving stupid eHarmony a shot again.  It's discouraging.  At least seven new matches daily, and not a one of them seems like a possibility.

There have been three guys on my mind lately.  One is now off-limits, one is now a friend without benefits, and one is my ex-husband.  The first still flirts and makes it so hard to continually say no.  The second is still as strange as ever.  And the third... well, we've been in contact a good amount lately, and I'm starting to miss him a lot again.

My realtor friend hooked me up with their lender who is supposed to be freakin awesome at getting people approved.  She didn't say no, but she did say it might be tricky.  I haven't heard from her since yesterday.  I'm hoping that means she's working her magic.  Oh yeah, found out my credit score is also freakin awesome.  That's gotta count for something, right?

Got an addition to my back tattoo last night.  Already ready to add some more.

Hurry up, washing machine!  I'm tired!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Movin' On Up (Trying To)

I fell in love this past weekend.  With a house.  With this house...

Isn't it purdy?!  It's a foreclosure and is a steal for the price.  It does need some work, but it would be fun fixing it up.  It's a no go though.  I applied for a pre-approval and was denied.  Debt to income ratio is too high.  Bah.

I've got a plan though.  I mentioned the plan a little while ago but never got the ball rolling with it.  Now that I have something tangible in mind now, I feel more motivated.  That house will probably be gone by the time I'm ready to buy, but there are quite a few in town that are just what I'm looking for.  I used to work with a girl who is also a realtor, and she's going to help me find the perfect one.  I can't wait!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Birthday and V-day

I turned 29 Sunday! I enjoyed it so much I think I just may turn 29 again next year. And maybe the year after that, haha. This is the gift from my parents, my new baby...

I love her!  Anyways, had a great weekend.  Went up to Raleigh on Friday and hung out with friends.  We had a fabulous time, and I came back Sunday to a wonderful dinner with the parents.  There was lots of cake.

I have a date tonight!  A friend at work and I are both single, so we decided to be each others' Valentine.  She's getting me flowers, and I got her her favorite chocolate.  We're going to see a sappy movie tonight.  Should be a nice evening.  Hoping it'll take my mind off the fact that I was proposed to four years ago today.  I had totally forgotten about that fact until last night, and now it keeps running through my mind.  It was such a nice proposal.

The ex and I have been friendly lately. Just through email and FB, but it's been very nice. I feel like I'm getting the closure I've needed.  I'm glad we're talking again and are becoming friends.  His dad even sent me a friend request again.  I wasn't sure how to take that and a few things he said, but I'm choosing to believe it's all in good nature.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

♪ The world spins madly on... ♫

I'm gonna punch my ear in the face, if that's possible.  Stupid vertigo has been going on for three days now.  My left ear's been fuzzy, so I'm blaming it for all the work I've missed.  I just went to the doctor for the first time in years last month for the flu, and I refuse to go again this soon after.  Can't really afford it anyway, so I'm hoping it'll clear up soon.  Had it once last year, and it went away after a few days.  Strangely it disappeared the day AF arrived last time, so I thought they might be connected.  I started to feel better last night, and AF arrived today, so I was thinking I was good.  Wrong!  Came back with a freakin vengeance this afternoon.

I've got weekend birthday plans, dammit!!  I've got mini road trips to take and friends to see... tomorrow!  You'd better be gone by tomorrow, or else!!  I have nothing to back that threat up with, but I'll be pretty pissed.  I really want to be able to drive and sing really loud in the car tomorrow.  I want to chillax this weekend.  Do people still say "chillax"?

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

A Calm Morning

As much as I miss the physical contact, I now think the boy and I really are better at being just friends.  The conversation flows more easily, and we're more open about things.  We actually fell asleep talking the other night.  The next day was his birthday, and I decked out his house after he went to work that morning.  Then he invited me over for a movie the next night.  It's been good.

Been emailing a little with the ex.  Just polite conversation about the dogs and life, but it's been kinda nice.  I keep going back and forth about whether I want to try to open the lines of communication between us more.  I don't know if he'd even want that, but I feel like I may be emotionally more ready for it than I was before.  Maybe.

Not sure if I've mentioned this before, but I've started knitting.  Awesome roommate taught me how a few weeks ago, and I'm hooked.  Sounds boring, but it's so calming.  I'm starting easy with a scarf.  Some days at work, I can't wait to just go home, turn on some tunes and knit.  I get to be lost in thought or just zone out if I want.

Life is good right now.