Sunday, December 23, 2012

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas!

That song's in my head, and I love it!

It's been a good, busy week.  Work was crazy with all the holiday business.  Only a half day tomorrow, which is fantastic.  We had our staff Christmas party at a restaurant downtown last night, and it was wonderful.  It was probably the most low-key one I've been to, but I think everyone had a good time.  We did the "White Elephant" thing, and I stole a gift card.  I felt kinda bad "stealing" a gift, but the person who first had it went up and ended up with another of the same, so no harm, no foul!

Found a very old friend on FB yesterday.  He had sent me a message back in freakin March, but it went to some "Other" folder in the message center that I'd never seen until yesterday.  I was going through FB's new security things and learned about it.  Craziness.  It's a cool story with him though... We met in a chat room (remember those?!) back when we were both in 8th grade which was 1997, I think.  We emailed and chatted all through high school, then finally met when we were 20 or so.  We kind of fell out of touch about five years ago.  It's nice to talk to him again.

I'm so excited for Tuesday!  I think I've nailed all my gifts for everyone this year.  My favorite one is for my step-dad.  He's a writer and has been in the process of turning one of his screenplays into a novel for quite some time now.  He's got it based in our old town and mentioned once he'd hoped to get a picture of the river at sunrise for the cover.  I finally dragged my ass out of bed early enough and drove there on a gorgeous morning this week.  There was a mist on the river, and the sun made it glow.  I noticed a cop keeping an eye on me, but I think he was just being nosy, haha.  The pictures turned out beautifully, and I can't wait for him to see them.  He's not in the best of health, and I don't know if he'll get to finish that book, but maybe this will keep him going on it for a bit.

Happy Holidays!

Monday, December 17, 2012

Does My Dog Count?

The other day at work, I was printing a receipt on our ancient dot-matrix printer and thought I heard the customer ask "Are you ready for Christmas?"  With the printer being so freakin loud, I wasn't sure if that was what she had really said, so I asked her to repeat it.

"Is your baby ready for Christmas?"

My reply?  "Um... my dog is ready."

"Oh, I thought you were the one that had the baby."


This happens all the time.  A girl left almost two years ago when she had her baby, and so many of our clients seem to think I'm her.  Even though I was there way before her and have been there way after she left.  It's really awkward each time too.  I love getting to say, "Nope, not me.  I don't have any kids."  All.  The.  Time.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Blah, blah, blah... funny video

This is the second Christmas season without the husband, and a much as I hate to say it, I still miss him.  I don't dwell on it most of the time anymore, but every now and then I do think about it.  He just got me, and the more time that passes, the more less likely it seems that I'll be able to find that with another person.  (Other than my ex-roommate turned best friend... she totally gets me, but it's just not quite the same, haha.)

Things with the boyfriend have been amazing lately, and I do love him, but it doesn't feel the same as it did with the ex-husband.  I know it's not supposed to, but there are several things that are missing.  I think one is that "can't live without you and don't even wanna think about trying" feeling.  I'm sad it's not there.  I thought it was in the beginning, but a lot of that was lust and also just really wanting to find the one and settle down so damn badly.

I think I'm just scared right now.  I'm in a relationship that is supposed to end in a few months, which is just weird.  He said the other night he wasn't sure he wants it to end.  Sometimes I do wonder if maybe we could be right for each other.  We've still got time, and maybe those feelings can develop.  But then again, if they were going to be there, shouldn't they already be by now?  I don't want to trick myself into believing they are just because I'm scared of starting over again.

I keep wanting to find a man that's totally right for me, but what if there isn't one?  What if I have him now and am blowing it?  I'm over thinking things right now, geez.  In my heart I feel I will find the one I'm meant to be with, but obviously I do stress about it... occasionally.

Funny video about how I sometimes feel now and my fears for the future...

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Rotten Eggs

Did anyone see that episode of New Girl a few weeks ago where Jess and Cece started freaking out about their fertility?  Their lady doctor friend informed them that a woman loses about 90% of her eggs by the age of thirty.

In all my reading and studies while TTC I didn't recall seeing that particular statistic so I chose to believe it was made up for TV Land, but a little Googling informed me otherwise.  Apparently there was a study several years ago which determined that terrifying number.  So... I guess I only have about 12% of my ovarian reserve left right now.

That's just fucking fantastic.

"Who's gonna lay a flag down on this sweet, sweet continent?"  I don't know but I guess I'd better find out pretty fucking soon.

Courtesy of

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Vanishing Act

I wrote this really long post yesterday, but it's all gone now.  Since the new app update, there's not a save draft button anymore.  Imagine my surprise when I came back to the app to find all my words had disappeared.  So, now for the short version...

Things with the boyfriend are okay right now.   I got a raise.  I'm excited for the holidays, have done my Christmas cards and am enjoying the holiday music.

There was something else, but I forget.