Waiting and Worrying

It’s scary to think something could be wrong with my body. Something that could make it harder to or keep me from having children. My doctor’s appointment isn’t for another month and a half, and the waiting is driving me crazy. All I do is stress about what could be wrong. I’m constantly online doing research and I think that’s good and bad. Good because I’m learning and I feel I’ll be more informed when I actually see the doctor. Bad because it scares me to know all the things that can go wrong and makes the waiting and not knowing that much harder.

From what I’ve learned I think it may be one of two things. The first isn’t too bad and can be treated pretty easily. It just covers a few of my symptoms though. The second one would explain a lot more of them, but it’s a little trickier to work with. Depending on the severity of it, things could work out okay on their own or could need some more in depth treatment, possibly surgery. And that’s expensive without insurance. We’d work it out, but it adds to the stress.

I wish I could just see the doctor already so we could know one way or the other. Time’s been going by pretty quickly, so hopefully it will continue to do so. I hope the doctor takes me seriously. I hate how they can be so condescending and just brush stuff off sometimes. Of all the doctors I’ve been to throughout my life, I think there’s only been two who I actually felt were truly concerned about whatever I was seeing them for at the time. Maybe she’ll be number three. If not I’ll find someone else, hopefully not having to wait two months to get in again. I guess we’ll see.